Sunday, September 23, 2007

. love and loss .

. love and loss .

i have always been the type of person who appreciates what is happening while it happens... savours flavours, and remembers silly details about the day.
i associate music with people i love or loath... i even get an emotional recall when the atmosphere outside is a certain stillness, or grayness...or tickles my nose with the play of rain...

my mom called me yesterday right before we were embarking on our whidby island expedition... she called with a quiver in her voice and told me that it had been time for LJ, one of our family dogs, to be put down. funny how sentimental i am. how i get sooo wrapped up in animals as being more as family members than pets...

she had been going down hill for awhile, but the last three days my parents did all that they could for her. i know that it was sooo hard for them to have to deal with this kind of thing. my mom told me it was like having one of her own kids die.. she's strong.. yet broken up by it.

so the last day or so i have been a bit uneasy.. i am fully rational and have accepted the passing of LJ, even happy that her suffering has ended and that her spirit can play and run without any limitations; but, what has been leaving me with anxiety is how Hooch, LJ's sister, will deal with the loss of her sibling. i worry about my dad and his attachment to them... i guess i just feel so far away from them and wish i could do more to help them mourn and cope. i know that we have to process such feelings and in time they hurt less.. but i wish that i could do more.

i talked to my mom for almost an hour and 45 mins today.. and we left with a bit of lightness on the phone. we had chuckled about old times and how life goes by so quickly. we made a little pact that we would try to live fully each day. drink in the sun, and savour our relations with others.

so this is a reminder those who read this, and perhaps myself too.. that we need to live each day being devoted to that day and not in the past or lost in the future. savor the moment when you notice that the afternoon sun is kissing the trees that try to touch the stars.. be present with your families.. even when miles are between you and listen to their words rather than interject the occasional uh huhs.. while you are multitasking...

the moment is real.
i enjoyed each moment with my old friend LJ.. i will miss her soo much. but i know that i truly was in the moment the times i spent with her.

savour each breath.

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

..Pirates stay Crunchy in Milk..

It's national talk like a Pirate day and since I havent the time to come up with anything witty at 7am.. i am posting a story that i wrote ages ago about meeting my hubbie!

When last we met, th' Syren had been listing near to scuppers.
Blimey! She was done with the dankness of scurvy scalleywags. All she be needing was th' stars above, shanties to sing, and a thirst for the briny deep. Alas, th' winds decided to set a squiffy course. She found herself marooned and disguised as a landlubber. "'Twas the hempen halter," she thought. "I am sunk." Sink me! What treasure she was about to find!

This landlocked port was dull, full of messdeck lawyers and sprogs. She was in need of a new crew. Mates! Corsair Jacks to help her hoist th' colours. Arr, a treacherous chase indeed!

On th' turn of th' new moon, she dropped anchor at the Gypsy CoffeeHouse to inquire about working her Syren ways. Th' barmaid whispered , "Speak o' th' Captain," and pointed to a dark painted buccaneer in the corner. Her deadlights fixed on the Jack Tar and curiousity filled her sails. The Syren downed a glass o' grog, needin' a bit o' th' Dutch Courage, and floated on th' doldrums to him. With a wink and a knock o' th' table, she nodded at th' Captain. "Ahoy" said she in a voice o' th' wind. He looked up at th' she-pirate as if the he had been ensnared by a mermaid. "That rum from PaddyLack Jim runs a jig!" he thought to himself. Snapping up with a deep blink and a shake, th' old seadog stood up to only to tumble back into his chair as if hit by a rogue wave. Shiver Me Timbers!

"Seems th' clap o' thunder has ye." she laughed extending her arm to help him gather his sealegs. "Arrr, ye be the stars I set sail by," he whispered. And by the powers of Poseidon, before ye could even say 'Walk th' Plank', he scooped her up and pirated the Syren!

Aye, smartly to the crow's nest they weighed anchor for a bit o' rum & um... things that would catch th' sunset in ye cheeks!

Th' two set sail aboard the swift and mighty Phoenix . Stories are told, over many a mead, of two who'd come and go leaving a wake of lemon poppyseed muffins. It is thought that th' old Cap' and th' Syren are now The Dread Pirate Poppyseed and Black Charity.

So says th' legends......

Saturday, September 08, 2007

. quatre ans .

on the 17th of august, we celebrated the four year anniversary of our meeting...


like a treasure on the shore, one finds the most amazing things when one is not looking.

the summer of 2003, my life was dismal at best.
i had just moved my entire life to tulsa, oklahoma from the beauties of victoria, british columbia. i went from cool and groovy to stagnant and suffocating.

my best gurl elizabeth came to visit me 2 weeks after i had moved.
we spent the weekend partying hard in the 108 degree temp, drinking much, and experience the ever so awful night club scene. on the hung over sunday, we decided to head over to the gypsy coffeehouse for a tamer night of coffee and tea and because i had heard that there was an open mike there. I asked the girl behind the counter about the festivities and she told me that i needed to speak with Captain. it was rumored that he might be in tonight.

well with luck, he did arrive. he had decided to pop in before heading out to see autumn shade play at a bar down the way. we talked for about an hour and i felt that he was the first normal person that i had found in tulsa. i definitely needed to know him better...

and on tuesday i went to the open mike, heard him read poetry... asked him if i could buy a chatbook from him and he said, i would like to buy you a drink...
so that thursday, was the day.
i was photographing the HOPE benefit at the PAC and told him that i would meet him after at this place called Caz's...
my sister came with me! OY! but she was worried.. and when i said. .. it's okay, i can take a cab home.. she was hesistant, but complied.

that night we talked and talked and talked!
we walked to the center of the universe...
we danced in ballerina park..
and we kissed on a bridge under the stars..

he asked if i believed in spontanious living..
and i said yes

he's been by my side ever since.


i love being in love.
especially with my best friend.